I am not an expert on the condition of Muslim women and I love feminine beauty too much to advocate the burka here. But I am defending some of the values that the burka and modesty covering such as the hajib represent for me.

The Muslim woman's focus is her home, the "nest" where her children are born and reared. She is the "home" maker, the taproot that sustains the spiritual life of the family, nurturing and training her children, providing refuge and support to her husband. 

In America, the cultural measure of a woman's value is her sex appeal. (As this asset depreciates quickly, she is neurotically obsessed with appearance and plagued by weight problems.) 

As an adolescent, her role model is Britney Spears, a singer whose act approximates a strip tease. From Britney, a child learns that she will be loved only if she gives sex. Thus, she learns to "hook up" furtively rather than to demand patient courtship, love and marriage. As a result, dozens of males know her before her husband does. She loses her innocence, which is a part of her charm. She becomes hardened and calculating.

 The feminine personality is founded on the emotional relationship between mother and baby. It is based on nurturing and self-sacrifice. Masculine nature is founded on the relationship between hunter and prey. It is based on aggression and reason. 

This is especially destructive for woman. Her sexual attraction is a function of her fertility. As fertility declines, so does her sex appeal. If a woman devotes her prime years to becoming "independent," she is not likely to find a permanent mate. However, that problem is being handled through the emasculation of the male through drugs and social manipulation and the politically correct protected promotion of alternative lifestyles.

Her long-term personal fulfillment and happiness lies in making marriage and family her first priority. 

Feminism is another cruel New World Order hoax that has debauched American women and despoiled Western civilization. It has ruined millions of lives and represents a lethal threat to Islam. 

Among almost all Muslims today, there has been a huge change. Couples are couples and the polygamous faction has faded to a great degree. This, too, is a shame because it robs the poorer members of society, widows, etc of a place to live and leaves more of them in the dire position of poverty. The original reason for taking multiple wives was originally to accommodate the needs of such women.  

Today in the more modern cities and areas of the Middle East, polygamy, while not a thing of the past, is no longer the norm. Also the cost of living has made it harder for a man to support more than one household since every wife is to be treated equally to the other in everything from time spent with each to the accommodations supplied.


The media portrays Muslim women wearing a hijab as weak, with scared eyes. Always with a black hijab, eyes pleading for help from the western readers. Never once have I've seen a picture in a Norwegian newspaper of a smiling Muslim woman wearing a colorful hijab. 

Like the ones I do see every day. They are beautiful, some are simply stunning. I bought my own hijab last year because I think it looks so pretty. I have not worn it in public, but I've made numerous promises both online and in RL that I will wear the hijab, a burka or a niqab if a ban ever is to be implemented. And the police, politicians, feminists and racists would have a very hard time explaining why I, a liberated western woman wearing this garment of my own free will, was fined for being out in public. A very hard time indeed.


We in the west have a lot to learn about respect. And far too many of us need to learn that today integration has a meaning similar to assimilation.The women's liberation movement, the french revolution, the black power movement all led to the rights we in the west have today.

Al Hamdulillah, was-Salat was-Salam ala Rasulillah. Allahu 'Alim.
(It is Allah who has All Knowledge).

Rights and Limits

First of all, it is important for us to keep in mind that Islam came to establish two very important fundamentals for human beings:
Rights and Limits.

Everyone and everything has certain rights given to it by the Creator and Sustainer of the universe (Allah). At the same time, each creation has its own limitations established by Allah.

First Right - Allah has the right to be worshipped without making partners from what He has created. Direct worship to Him, alone.

Second Right - Prophet's right to be followed according to his teaching and commandments.

Third Right - Parents rights to be honored and cared for, with special emphasis on the mother first.

Fourth Right - Wives and Husbands have rights on each other.

Conditions 1,400 Years Ago

Now let us do some basic research here. We begin by looking into the condition of the women in various societies at the time 1,400 years ago when Allah revealed the Quran to Muhammad, Peace and blessings be upon him.

Pagan Arabs - Burying Girls Alive

During that time the pagan Arab men used to bury their newborn daughters alive in the sand, out of shame for having something so low and disgusting like a girl instead of a son. Women were treated horribly and with utter disgust.

Men could marry as many as they liked and very often they owned women like cattle or sheep. There were no laws to protect the women and they had no rights at all.

Christians - Arguing If Women Had Souls

Christians at that time were holding council meetings to determine whether or not a woman even had a soul. The church blamed "Eve" the mother of all humans after Adam (Peace and blessings be upon him) for the "original sin" and damned her and her seed for what she had done.

Priests - Best Men - Forbidden Marriage - To Any Women

Priests, bishops, cardinals and even the Pope are the very best of the Catholic men within the church. Yet the church still forbids their clergymen the chance for marriage and families. This unnatural situation has caused very serious ramifications throughout the society around the world.

Nuns - Best Women - No Marriage - No Children

Nuns are the very best of the Catholic women. They cover themselves in proper attire much the same way as the Muslim women. Yet, they are never allowed to marry or have children throughout their lives. This unnatural condition has caused untold number of disgraceful and disgusting practices within the very church itself.

If Only Bad People Have Children - What About Tomorrow?

We must ask the question, "If the very best of the men and the very best of the women are not allowed to marry or have children - does this mean only the worst of the people are the ones allowed to reproduce and populate the world?" - And where will that leave us tomorrow?

Jews - Blame Women and Curse Women

The Jews blamed women for the "original sin" and as such they were treated with disgust. A woman's monthly cycle was considered by the Old Testament of the Bible to be a "curse from God" for her inequities. Her child bearing pains were also a 'punishment from God' for her bringing man down from heaven.

Islam - No Blame On Women For Evil

Islam does not blame Eve for Adam's sin. Each of them accepted their own mistake and repented to Allah, and asked Allah to forgive them and Allah did forgive them.

Now before going any further, please read Surah An Nisa (chapter 4 in the Quran) - all the way through, in order to better understand what is actually being said about women, men and marriage.

Read Quran

Now let us think about the verses. Do you believe that Allah Knows what He created and He has revealed the perfect 'Deen'? Do you know the condition of the people at the time the order came to restrict the number of wives? (Restricted to be only four)

Now read the verse about having more than one wife, very carefully. [Noble Quran 4:3]

What does it say? And what do you understand from it?

Now read the ayah (verse) that forbids men to marry women who are already married. [Noble Quran 4:24].

Now read from An Nisa (Chapter 4) about the role of men and women. [Noble Quran 4:34]

Man Supports And Protects Women

Do you understand that one must take on the role of supporter, protector, provider, custodian and servant to the family (man's role)?

Woman Gives Birth - Raises Children

One must take on the role of carrying the child and delivering it and then feeding it and raising it to become a true servant of Allah (woman's role).

Not Equal - But Treated Fairly In Justice

Men and women are not the same nor are they "equal" as some folks would have us believe. Whatever is on one side of an 'equals' sign must be exactly the same as what is on the other side without any difference in value, only in the way that it is expressed. How then could we say that a man, who is unable to conceive or give birth and then breast feed a baby is the equal to a woman who can?

Equal In Faith And Actions

They are equal in their beliefs and good deeds of course. But still they are not the same as each other. Each one must fulfill their role as humans.

Children's Rights Protected

Islam is also very much about rights. Children also have rights in Islam. When a man dies his wealth is left to his family. How could the court know who to give the wealth of a man, if he was one of several husbands to a woman? How would a child know who his father was? No society ever supported the concept of a woman being married to two or more men at the same time.

Women's Right - Best Treatment

Almost every society supported the concept of a man having more than one woman. Yet, they did not limit the number nor did they provide the protection and maintenance that Islam insists on for each one. Islam came to set things straight. Women were given rights. Men were strictly ordered to treat their women with the very best of treatment.

Limit - Number in Marriage

When the verse was revealed the companions of Muhammad (Peace and blessings be upon him) did not run out with the attitude that they were going to get four wives all of a sudden. Some of them already had much more than that and these men had to divorce their wives, if they had more than four. So this was not an order to go out and get four wives. It was an order to begin limitations. And the first limitation was; No more than four.

Limit - Equal Maintenance and Treatment

Second, the limitation of equal treatment for all of them. How could a man keep more than one wife unless he was exceedingly wealthy and/or exceedingly strong and virile?

Next, the limitation very clearly states; ".. but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one ..."

Muslims Today - Most Monogamous

Step by step, the men of Islam have come to be known today as the most monogamous of all men on earth (we only have one wife). Check for yourself and see. In the majority of all the Muslim homes on earth, a man gets married once, to one woman and then he stays married to her until the death of either himself or his wife.

Woman's Right To Choose Any Husband She Likes - Even If He Is Already Married

One very important point that is often overlooked by modern society is the right that Islam gave to the women that it does not give to the man. A man is limited to marry only from the woman who is not already married. Obviously, this provides rights for the children and provides for them from inheritance from the father. But Islam also permits the women to marry a man who is already married to protect her in a society where the number of women outnumbers the population of men. Additionally, the woman has a large selection of men to choose from. In fact, she has the right to choose from any man in the community as long as he does not already have four wives. She also has the opportunity to see how the other wife was being treated and go into a marriage knowing exactly what to expect from her husband. After all, he must treat her in the same way as he is treating the other wife.

Women Need Husbands - Allah Provided the Answer

The prophet (Peace and blessings be upon him) predicted that in the Last Days the women would outnumber the men to a great extent. Today we are seeing this become a reality all over the world. Allah has already provided for us for this occasion. After all, He is the One who makes it all happen and He already knew that many women would come into Islam in these days. He also knew many of the Muslim men would be killed or die at an early age, just as it is happening these days. These women all need husbands. Allah has given us the solution to all of life's problems.

Women's Right to Vote - 1,400 Years Ago

We might add that Islam also gave the women full status as citizens over 1,400 years ago by giving her to right to speak and vote the same as anyone else. American women had to take their cause to the streets with "Women's Suffrage" and were not granted the right to vote until just ninety years ago.

Women Keep Their Identity - And Their Names

Additionally, Islam protected women's rights to keep their identity and they were not considered property of some man. As such, they were no longer forced to change their last names to be that of their husbands. This is still the practice of Muslim women today just as it was fourteen hundred years ago.

Women Keep Their Property And Earnings - Men Must Share

Yet, at the same time the western society is so concerned about the way Islam demands that a couple be married, the man actually must work instead of the woman; the woman owns her own property without giving anything for the support of the house or the child; a child has the right to his or her own mother raising them instead of a baby sitter or day care; father must support his children; divorce is hated; and marriage is sanctified.

West Can't Tolerate Man And Woman - In Marriage

It is strange isn't it, a society like America, has no problem accepting sex without marriage; homosexuality; same sex marriages; sex without responsibility; children without fathers; and divorces are more common place than the measles or chicken pox. Yet, there is no tolerance for marriage between a man and a woman if it is not on their terms.

What Needs to Be Re-evaluated?

Compare the two for yourself and see which one needs correction.



Jazakum Allahu Khayran was Salam Alaykum,

Sheikh Yusuf Estes

You cannot escape it. The discussion about habits is all around you: Mom and Dad are constantly telling you to break your bad habits; your teachers are telling you to develop good habits; your friends are pressuring you to adopt their habits; and the television and media are influencing you to explore new and supposedly cool habits. "You will never be successful," the constant refrain goes, "unless you drop your bad habits and develop some good habits." In the end, it's all up to you. You have to decide what your habits are going to be. Have you given this matter some thought?

If you are alive and breathing, you should constantly be engaged in an inner struggle to develop habits which draw you closer to Allah Most High. Success in this world is directly related to the strength of your relationship with Allah. The farther one is from Allah and the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), the less likely one is to achieve success in this world and, for sure, even less likely to achieve success in the hereafter. Is it not time for us to reflect upon Islamic teachings to discern the necessary habits of highly successful Muslim youth?

Here are at least seven habits indispensable for highly successful Muslim youth, derived entirely from the Qur'an and the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).

Be Truthful

Being truthful is not always easy, especially when we make a mistake. We fret over whether or not to disclose exactly what happened. We sweat, we are afraid, we feel nervous and anxious. We are often afraid that if we tell the truth about what we have done or said, we will be in trouble with our parents or friends. What we forget is that whether we tell the truth or not, Allah Most High knows exactly what took place, even those things that were never manifest or visible to people around us. Despite how burdensome telling the truth might seem, all of us are aware of the feeling of relief we experience when we tell the truth, even if the consequence of telling the truth is punishment. Casting the telling of truth and the fate of the truthful in terms of profit and loss, Allah Most High tells us in the Qur'an

[This is a day on which the truthful will profit from their truth: theirs are gardens, with rivers flowing beneath — their eternal Home: Allah well-pleased with them, and they with Allah. That is the great salvation, (the fulfillment of all desires).] (Al-Ma'idah 5:119)

So much is to be gained from being truthful as opposed to escaping punishment or blame because of not being truthful. Not being truthful, in fact, leads us down a slippery slope, guaranteeing that with one lie, more lies must be told. Being truthful is not an option for Muslims, but rather an obligation, because our goal in being truthful is Paradise. The beloved of Allah, Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), said, as narrated by `Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with him),

Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to Paradise. And a man keeps on telling the truth until he becomes a truthful person. Falsehood leads to al-fujur [wickedness, evil-doing], and al-fujur leads to the (Hell) Fire, and a man may keep on telling lies till he is witten before Allah, a liar." (Sahih Bukhari, Book #73, Hadith #116)

Ultimate success is therefore achieved by living one's entire life — the youthful years, the adult years, and the elderly years — being truthful.

Be Trustworthy

Who do you rely on? Of course, Allah. He is indeed the Most Trustworthy. But among humans, who do you rely on? Who can you trust to come through for you all the time? Do people rely on you? Are you considered trustworthy?Moving ahead in life, achieving ultimate success, requires that people consider you trustworthy and reliable. Being trustworthy should not be an arbitrary activity but rather a habit so that you can be relied upon in all instances, big or small, convenient or inconvenient, easy or difficult.

In colloquial terms, we often hear "I've got your back," implying, in the most literal sense, that people cannot see what is behind them so they need to rely on their friends to cover that angle, just in case a threat occurs from the back. Just imagine what it would be like if a friend were climbing a tree and was heading out onto a very thin branch to get a kite that got stuck there. She asks you if you "have her back." In this instance, she is relying on you entirely to hold on to her in case the branch breaks. There is no room for joking around or for being distracted: your friend is trusting you with her life.

When we say Allah is the Most Trustworthy, we are coming to terms with the fact that Allah Most High will never let us down, will never leave our side. He, Most High, says about someone who willingly accepts Islam,

[Let there be no compulsion in religion: Truth stands out clear from error: whoever rejects evil and believes in Allah hath grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold, that never breaks. And Allah Heareth and Knoweth all things.] (Al-Baqarah 2:256)

Indeed, the prophets of Allah were all trustworthy people and Allah attested to the trustworthiness of those who were doubted by their communities. Prophet Hud, appealing to his community, declared to them,

[I but fulfill towards you the duties of my Lord's mission: I am to you a sincere and trustworthy adviser.] (Al-A`raf 7:68)

Practice daily developing the habit of being trustworthy. Accept responsibility and then fulfill it. When others trust you, do not betray their trust.

You can read in the beautiful biography of our Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) how people used to entrust him with their valuables, knowing that upon their return they would find their valuables safe and unharmed. His personal and business practices were commendable to the degree that he was known for it in his community, even before he became aware that he was the Prophet of Allah, literally one who is most truthful and trustworthy.

Have Self-Restraint and Be God-Conscious

Perhaps the most difficult challenge while navigating adolescence is to restrain oneself from falling victim to one's desires — especially one's lower desires.

Our success in life depends to a great extent on how well we are able to restrain ourselves and to be moderate in what is permissible, as well as how capable we are of distancing ourselves from what is impermissible.

Why is self-restraint so critical? Satan's goal is to make you a slave of your desires to the extent that you eat until you are actually uncomfortable; that you consume without restraint beverages made of caffeine, sugar, and artificial flavors; that you find yourself longing for sleep more than prayer; and that you yearn to satisfy your sexual desires. Developing self-restraint as a habit entails making self-restraint your second nature — something which is done almost without thought, without too much effort. We are reminded by Allah Most High,

[And no one will be granted such goodness except those who exercise patience and self-restraint, — none but persons of the greatest good fortune.] (Fussilat 41:5)

In seeking to be highly successful Muslim youth, that is, youth deserving of the greatest fortune, it is imperative that you develop self-restraint.

An interesting parallel is that, throughout his Qur'an translation, the late Abdullah Yusuf Ali translates taqwa as self-restraint. While taqwa is most commonly translated as "God-consciousness," one realizes without much effort that the height of self-restraint is full and complete understanding that one is indeed conscious of one's duty to one's Lord. How awesome will it be if you can look back at your life and say to yourself, all praise is due to Allah that I did not succumb to my lower desires and instead exercised self-restraint consistently!

Be Thorough

Look around your room. How many unfinished projects do you have? When you work on homework, are you likely to rush through the assignment just so you can be done with it or are you more likely to take your time, to check your work, and most importantly, to be thorough?

Often teachers will grade a report based on how well and to what extent the student covered the topic at hand. Being thorough is not a habit that is developed overnight. The opposite of being thorough is being incomplete, being rushed, and working in haste without any regard for accuracy or quality. The most perfect is Allah Most High, Who perfected creation, Who perfected our religion, and Who guided His Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) to be the most perfect among humans in behavior and in character.

We read in the Muwatta of Imam Malik "Yahya related to me from Malik that he had heard that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, 'I was sent to perfect good character'" (Book #47, Hadith #47.1.8).

To be thorough stems from a desire to be perfect to the extent that this is humanly possible. Seeking perfection in our actions and speech from an early age helps us to develop a keen eye, not only for thoroughness in our own life, but also for thoroughness in the lives of those around us. Being thorough in prayer, for example, teaches us to be patient and to concentrate upon the words we are reciting and the different positions of the prayer.

Be Focused

One thousand ideas go through your head the moment you stand up for prayer. Is that you? Really? What do you make of those ideas? Do you process them? What about when you are sitting in class? Do you find your mind wandering, daydreaming, and unable to focus on the lecture at hand? Are you likely to use any excuse whatsoever to leave what you are doing?

Developing the habit of being focused ensures that you are awake, alert, and totally motivated to work on and complete the task at hand, whatever it may be. Being distracted early on in childhood by video games, fast-paced imagery, and constantly changing scenes on television shows contributes to an inability to concentrate, to focus. Among the best ways to develop focus is to practice praying with deep concentration to the extent that you are almost unaware of your surroundings. Allah Most High tells us in the Qur'an that the believers are

[those who humble themselves in their prayers] (Al-Mu'minun 23:2)

The humility referred to here results from total focus and concentration on the fact that one is in the presence of Allah, standing before Him, Most High. Do your best to develop focus, no matter what activity you are engaged in — whether in prayer, in academics, in athletics, or some other pastime.

Be Punctual

Stop saying over and over again that you are late because of "Muslim standard time," or the "standard time" of your particular ethnicity. The last thing we should attribute to Islam is the notion that its teachings somehow make us late, slow, slugging, and anything but punctual. What a sad state of affairs, indeed, that we attribute our own weaknesses to our religion or ethnicity!

Highly successful individuals, be they Muslim or not, understand and appreciate the value of not only their time but the time of everyone else with whom they interact. Keeping people waiting for hours on end is neither something to be proud of nor a habit that has a place in the mindset of a person who tries to be successful.

One of the central pillars of Islam is prayer, and Allah and the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) have given us clear reminders that we are to establish prayers at their due times.

When `Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with him) asked "which deed is the dearest to Allah?" the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) replied, "To offer the prayers at their early stated fixed times" (Sahih Bukhari, Book #10, Hadith #505).

If indeed your day is to be considered successful, you must have prayed all the obligatory prayers at their established times and as many voluntary prayers as possible. If your day is planned around the times of prayer, you should not pray exactly at the time when you are to pray but then come late to all other appointments. Being punctual is a habit which, when perfected, demonstrates to others the tremendous value that Islam places on time — not only ours but that of everyone else with whom we interact.

Be Consistent


Apart from all the habits listed above, perhaps the one that is sure to help you become a highly successful Muslim youth is that of being consistent. One cannot be truthful one day and a liar the next; one cannot be trustworthy in one instance and totally unreliable in the next; and so on for each of the other habits. A Muslim understands from an early age that it is easier to do something once or whenever we feel like it but much harder to do something regularly and consistently.

Indeed, the Mother of the Believers `A'ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) narrates that "the most beloved action to Allah's Apostle was that which is done continuously and regularly" (Sahih Bukhari, Book #76, Hadith #469).

Regular and consist actions show that a person has thought about it, has intended to do it, has planned to do it, and therefore does it.

We urge you to be as consistent as possible, especially in those areas of your life which need constant improvement, such as your prayers, your fasting, your manners, your studying habits, etc. Do not say, I am going to pray all day every day, or fast voluntarily all of the days of every month, or study all night every night, because such actions cannot be humanly sustained over a long period of time. Say on the other hand, I am going to be sure to read at least one part of the Qur'an every day, or I will strive to help my parents with at least one household chore every day, or I will try to study at least one new item every week so that I can be ahead of the lesson plan.

Conclusion


Finally, Muslims aspire to develop all of these habits because, in doing so, we draw nearer to Allah Most High. If you are intent on being a highly successful Muslim youth, then you owe it to yourself to reflect upon your own life and see how many of these habits are already a part of who you are and how many you need to further develop or acquire.

We end with a reminder that developing these habits will help you to emulate the life of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him). His message and his life are summarized well in a narration of `Abdullah ibn `Abbas:

Abu Sufyan told me that Heraclius said to him, "When I enquired of you what he (Muhammad) ordered you, you replied that he ordered you to establish the prayer, to speak the truth, to be chaste, to keep promises, and to pay back trusts." Then Heraclius added, "These are really the qualities of a prophet." (Sahih Al-Bukhari, Book #48, Hadith #846)

Strive to develop the seven habits listed above and many others from the Islamic teachings so that you will be among the highly successful Muslim youth.

Note:

1. This was not her age at marriage.
2. Her parents offered marriage of their daughter to Muhammad (Peace and blessings be upon him).

First of all, not all questions are fair. Sometime people put statements in the questions which are not true. Therefore, we have to clarify some facts before we go any further:

Next thing is, we have to understand that Islam is all about "Rights and Limits". The Quran clarifies what everyone's rights are and what the limits are as well.

It was through this matrimony of marriage to the Prophet (Peace and blessings be upon him) that we found the example of the meaning of the limitations set forth in the fourth chapter of the Quran, entitled "The Women":

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